Always a mother

Liz Mitchell / Culpeper Star Exponent
Published: May 12, 2007

A few days before Justine Abshire died, she called her mom to talk about her upcoming honeymoon, the kids in her kindergarten class and not being able to go home for the holidays.

"And the last thing she said was, 'I love you, Mom. I will talk to you later on this week,'" Heidi Swartz said.

It's been six months since Abshire, a 27-year-old Barboursville resident, was killed in an apparent hit and run in western Orange County near the Greene County line. Her case is still under investigation.

Today - Mother's Day - Swartz will light a candle in her daughter's honor.

"I remember my first Mother's Day so well and being so proud and so excited to be a mother," she said. "And although I'll always be her mother and I have another daughter, it certainly won't be the same.

"I just recently was going through some things and I found old Mother's Day cards she had made for me as a child in school. I found a coupon book that was good for a free hug or the opportunity to read her a bedtime story, and I just was cleaning this morning and found a bunch of her baby clothes. And to believe that she's gone forever is still something that I can't quite get a hold of."

Heidi and Steve Swartz live in Chattanooga, Tenn. Their daughter Lauren is a Philadelphia resident. When the Swartz girls were little, they used to make their mom breakfast in bed every year.

"Which, not being a breakfast eater, was still very sweet," Heidi Swartz said with a laugh. "And she and her sister would often make dinner for me and totally trash the kitchen, but it was a big deal to make dinner for mom on Mother's Day."

The last Mother's Day Heidi Swartz spent with Justine was in 2002 - the year before she started teaching at Emerald Hill Elementary School.

"She was living with us in Chattanooga," Swartz said. "And I remember specifically that day it being beautiful weather and we took the dog and went for a long walk and we cooked dinner together."

When Justine couldn't be with her mom, she would always send a card with a personal note and thanks.

Heidi Swartz said when she thinks about Justine, she often recalls her recent wedding.

Justine and her husband, Eric, would have celebrated their first wedding anniversary at the end of this month.

"That was such a happy day for her," Swartz said. "We spent the whole weekend at a bed and breakfast. It was a whole weekend of family and friends. It was really lovely and she just looked like an angel."

Last month, Lauren married. Heidi Swartz said it was the first glimmer of joy her family has seen in six months.

"The wedding was beautiful, but certainly Justine's absence was felt by all of us," she said. "There was a big hole there that was supposed to be her sister. She was supposed to be the maid of honor."

Swartz said losing a child is an indescribable feeling, and without any resolution on the case, her family can't even begin to grieve. But she's hopeful the police will solve the mystery, and in the meantime her family is trying to stay strong and spending a lot of time together.

Swartz hopes families will appreciate Mother's Day this year and make it special because "you never know what might happen."
"Being a mother is the best thing that can ever happen to a woman," she said. "Whether you have little children with you or grown children who have moved away, or even a child that you've lost like I have, it's still Mother's Day. And I'll always be Justine's mother."

Liz Mitchell can be reached at 825-0771 ext. 110 or