Family fun if everyone in your family is seven

Eric Watkevich / Culpeper Star Exponent
Published: May 10, 2007

 Looking at the past games I've played, I realized that I was drifting away from my earliest supporters, the people I relate with the best and can always turn to for guidance; the 5- to 7-year-olds. What have I given them besides a bunch of violent, bloodthirsty (although awesome) videogames. This time I give back to my people. Toddlers everywhere, E.W's representin' the crib (literally).

I tried to take one for the team by playing "Meet the Robinsons," a game from Disney, but all I have to say is. "Man, I hate my people." You little kids need to grow up and get to hurting people, because this Disney crap is getting old. "Meet the Robinsons" is based, I assume, on a recent computer generated movie of the same name, if I'm wrong, I don't care.

All you do is complete some lame objectives and puzzles in order to reach your goal, which is itself, lame. Pile on the cheap looking graphics and horrible camera and you have yourself one torture chamber of a game. I gave up on "Meet the Robinsons" after the camera made me look at the ceiling for half an hour for no reason. That and after the "Find Grandpa's teeth mission!" Finding out how to open the garage door in the game for half an hour was fun too. Nothing says "I want children to suffer" more than this videogame experience.

"But Beloved Leader Eric, (that's my name when I talk to myself) you shouldn't put a game made for young kids on the same standard as one that is geared toward adults. That's unfair and biased, something that a good journalist should never do."

"Now that's a good point, small, kind-hearted, weak Eric (that's the real me). I'm being prejudiced towards violence and not being open-minded to what other age groups may enjoy.

So here's my answer; I could care less about "Meet the Robinsons" and any kid that likes this game is either severely deprived or a Communist. Now Little Eric, go back into the corner of my mind and think about puppies or something."

Thus Little Eric starts to cry and everything is good.

I have talks with myself like this on a daily basis. My doctor tells me it's healthy.

Anyway, "Meet the Robinsons" has a hurried feel to it, as though the makers were rushed to release the game alongside the movie. This was probably the case and it unfortunately happens to many games that could have otherwise been fun. I could however see youngsters playing the videogame, as it is goofy and simple to play. But the dismal camera and hideous controls make this family fun a dud.